It’s no secret that work is a bit of a challenge at the moment. It doesn’t help that the boss has told several people who work for me that he’s ‘piling on the pressure to see who jumps first’. I had a major meltdown again last week. Haven’t had a melt down so far this week, but it is only Monday. I’ve come to the conclusion today that even if I resign tomorrow, I’ll not be the first. We’ve lost someone already. One. Of. The. Good. Guys.
It’s the risk you take with that particular ‘management style’ (the pressure style, the weed out the weak style). The risk is that you lose the good guys and get stuck with the ones you’d really hoped had gone. The question is…what am I? One of the good ones or one of the ones he wants to keep?
Am I paranoid? Can I really get 2 + 2 = 4? Or am I just imagining the worst? And seeing the very worst there is?
I’ll move away now and take my conspiracy theories to bed with me. Night night.
Today I left work barely holding it together. It wasn’t just one thing that got to me, but a number of things. The last thing – the final straw? A skype message from an employee. ‘if they think that xxxxx can replace you, I mean do your job, take over from you, they are wrong.’
Come on, seriously. How would you feel? When xxxxx sits next to you and was a recent addition by the new boss? I have to question what’s been said to make this employee feel so upset by the idea? Said employee is not known for ‘inventions’ of this nature.
Follow that with a call from the dragon lady and my evening has been ruined. I had red wine for dinner.
I feel guilty too. There are people in Japan with nothing…
More wine please.
Thankfully, my wonderful boyfriend was here, waiting for me when I got home.
Last year in January I made the decision to have braces fitted. No, not train tracks, but the modern equivalent. In-Ovation C – brackets. I’m now over a year in and my teeth have moved considerably, but I’m still looking at another year of braces. The reason for the post is to give anyone thinking of doing braces as an adult an open and honest view.
When I first got the top braces on, I researched on the net about whether the braces would interfere with life in other ways than the expected ones. As an adult, you don’t realise just how bad it’s going to get. It’s not just having a mouth full of sharp metal wires, elastic bands and tongue spikes etc. There’s also the unbelievable discomfort of teeth that break from their connection to the jaw. Wobbly teeth. Teeth that click. And a constant ache. Not to mention the change in diet, or the foods you can’t eat (at all).
But, the worst bit for me, is the the way it interferes with kissing and anything remotely passionate. Braces just get in the way.
My dentist asked if I would talk to some of his other patients to encourage them to have the same treatment. I had to say no. Had I known how much this would interfere, I would have opted for the more drastic option. Dentures.
A couple of weeks ago my company issued its IMS. In the statement we missed our EBITDA contribution by a few percent. In the same announcement we also announced a restructuring charge of between $14-18m. It sent shivers down the spines of all colleagues that have lived through such ‘restructures’ in the past.
On Friday it began.
Mid afternoon the whispers began in the office. The Skype messages went back and forth between colleagues worried for each other. And the rumours about office closures, and numbers of lay-offs spread like wild fire.
Today, I took a phone call asking whether the restructure had happened in our office, that it was rumoured to be happening today.
Unfortunately, it didn’t. I say unfortunately, not because I’m being flippant, but because I’m already mopping up the tears of my team members who are worried, no, distraught at the impending changes and over losing their jobs. I’m in no different position. I face being put ‘at risk’, just like all of them. None of us know. None of us have any clues. It’s the not knowing that is upsetting people. People add one and one and make three.
The atmosphere sucks. It’s oppressive in the office. It’s difficult to concentrate. It’s like waiting for the guillotine to fall.
So, here I sit, not looking forward to tomorrow. But, I’ll get up in the morning. I’ll put my face on and I’ll drive the 40 miles to the office. You never know, I might be home again soon. Then again, maybe it’ll be tomorrow evening before I’m back.